Lemon Cream Biscuits

A short story by Maria Caesar

Writers group activity: write a story based on half-eaten packet of biscuits sitting on table before us.

The packet of lemon cream biscuits sat in the centre of the table. Olga and Sophia stared at the open package, both in turn glaring at the other. They had attended five Weight Watchers meetings and the pair were on edge, desperate with near starvation, yet neither was willing to admit it. Moments earlier, to their horror, it was discovered only one biscuit remained.

“I won’t eat it,” Olga crossed her arms. “I’ve worked too hard already. You can get fat on it.”

Sophia chuckled, “Oh Olga, I insist. You have the last biscuit. You look hungry. I can actually see you ‘chafing at the bits’!”

“Ha!” Olga burst out. “You can talk! You better wipe that drool off your chin Sophia, it’s very unbecoming of you.”

“Drool!” Sophia shrieked. “You would need a bucket and then some!”

“Just a bucket? You would need a water tank!” Olga retorted.

The cafeteria was silent as other diners watched the two large women argue over the biscuit.

“Oh no, not again.” Joe, the waiter, didn’t know whether to boot the women out or to run and hide. 

“You eat it,” Olga stated.

“No, you eat it.” Sophia replied.

In the meantime, a young boy only five years of age, skipped through the silent restaurant, oblivious to the thick tension in the air.  All of a sudden, the child reached onto the table, grabbed the supposedly rejected biscuit and gobbled it up in front of them. 
The two women gaped. Both faces went red with fury. 

Joe leapt from behind the counter, grabbed the kid and ran out the door.

Meanwhile, Olga and Sophia rolled up their sleeves. With murderous looks in their eyes they chanted: “Kill! Kill! Kill!”